Modeling Positive Behavior: Leading by Example to Manage Sibling Rivalry and Tantrums

Children learn by observing and mimicking the behavior of those around them, especially their parents and caregivers. Therefore, modeling positive behavior is crucial for managing sibling rivalry and tantrums. 

Here are some strategies you can implement:

Demonstrate Empathy and Respect:

  • Show empathy and understanding towards both children when they experience negative emotions.
  • Validate their feelings without judgment and offer support and guidance.
  • Speak to each child with respect, even when you are frustrated or angry.
  • Use “I” statements to communicate your own feelings and needs calmly and constructively.

Practice Effective Conflict Resolution:

  • When conflicts arise between siblings, model calm and rational problem-solving skills.
  • Encourage open communication and active listening between siblings.
  • Guide them in finding solutions that address everyone’s needs and promote fairness.
  • Avoid taking sides or getting caught in the middle of their disputes.

Encourage Cooperation and Teamwork:

  • Create opportunities for siblings to work together on projects or activities.
  • Highlight the benefits of cooperation and teamwork, such as achieving a common goal or having more fun together.
  • Celebrate their successes and achievements as a team.
  • Avoid fostering competition or comparing siblings to each other.

Promote Sharing and Kindness:

  • Encourage siblings to share toys, resources, and attention with each other.
  • Model acts of kindness and generosity in your own interactions with others.
  • Offer positive reinforcement for acts of kindness and sharing between siblings.
  • Discourage selfish behavior and teach the importance of considering others’ needs.

Maintain Calm and Consistency:

  • Even in challenging situations, strive to remain calm and collected.
  • Respond to tantrums and negative behavior with patience and understanding.
  • Avoid yelling, threats, or physical punishment, as these can escalate the situation.
  • Maintain consistent expectations and boundaries for behavior, ensuring fairness and predictability.


  • Modeling positive behavior is an ongoing process that requires patience and consistency.
  • Children learn through observation and repetition, so remain mindful of your actions and interactions throughout the day.
  • By setting a positive example, you can create a foundation for healthy sibling relationships, promote emotional intelligence, and equip children with the tools they need to navigate conflict constructively.

Additional Tips:

  • Engage in role-playing activities to help children practice positive conflict resolution and communication skills.
  • Read stories and discuss scenarios that promote positive sibling interactions.
  • Create a family contract outlining shared values and expected behaviors.
  • Seek professional support if you are struggling to manage sibling rivalry or model positive behavior effectively.

By actively modeling the behavior you want to see in your children, you can guide them towards developing strong sibling bonds, managing their emotions effectively, and resolving conflicts peacefully.

How Dr. Sumeet Dhawan Can Help:


Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *